Sorry for another break in posting – I can’t say it’s been an extraordinarily busy two days, but I was up quite late last night watching movies at home, by the end of which I was tired enough to go to bed without writing anything. It’s been a very normal couple of days. University yesterday was fine; I haven’t continued to worry too much about last term’s marks, thanks I think to my growing ability to hand things over to my higher power. Today I spent most of the day before the meeting surfing the internet as usual. I should have spent some time writing up that Psychology report, as I have to take something resembling the first draft to my supervisor on Monday. Unfortunately it’s still only half written, and I’m not sure how to get back into the swing of it. Hopefully things will start happening tomorrow!
Tonight’s meeting was great. I saw quite a few friends, and I shared very positively about my week. I found myself talking about serenity and ‘handing it over’ again. Beforehand I’d felt vaguely OK; afterwards I felt great, as I always do after a good share. We all went for coffee nearby as usual. I felt very comfortable in the social situation, knowing everyone so well. Not for the first time, I realised how far I’d come in the program, how much more at peace with myself I am compared to eight months ago. I was giving advice to newcomers and old timers tonight! A while ago I’d probably have thought my illness had been cured, just going on the evidence, but I’m not thinking that tonight. I know very well that there will always be good and bad days for me. The bad days pass, just as the good days do. There’s no cure for the illness, just a daily reprieve. Today, I’m able to live with and accept that.