Wednesday 11th June

Wednesday arrived and I could finally see my new room. It’s amazing. Everything turned out as hoped, of course. I love the desk, the coffee table, the new TV, and the bed, which is remarkably comfortable. Is there a saying about new rooms making a new person?

This evening I’ve looked in the mirror and I’m pleased to see that the never ending acne outbreak that I’ve suffered with the past couple of years is finally clearing. I’ve been using some strong new cream which seems to be working wonders at the moment. I guess there will never be a time when I won’t have to use it twice a day, given how bad my skin’s been this year, but I can’t complain.

At work I had a very interesting day. Me and the boss had a meeting booked with a major broadband provider this afternoon, to discuss their offering to our members and how it can work better. It had been years since I’d met any of our retail partners, so I was obviously nervous and excited in equal measure. I don’t know why going to meetings would make you feel important in a place like that, but somehow it does.

The retailer’s offices were very nice, as you’d expect. I was glad to finally meet the people that I have been e-mailing regularly for years and put faces to names. It was a successful meeting; all my points were addressed, and we came away with a new agreement on how to make things even better. I stopped short of asking if we could meet again in a year’s time: after everything discussed it didn’t seem entirely necessary.

I’d like to think that this is a sign of things changing for me at work, of me finally getting my voice heard. I don’t know. Somehow I don’t think things will ever change that much, unless I move to a different job. I noticed on the website today that they have a vacancy going for something which I could probably do, if I put my mind to it. It would inevitably mean taking on other responsibilities that I don’t know so much about, which I might not be so perfect for. Well, I could probably learn; there’s no doubt it would be a good move for me, were I to pull it off, in the eyes of the company. But with this we come back to the question of how happy I am with the way things are.

I’m certainly comfortable in the job that I’ve done for the past five years, and I like the team that I work with more than ever. Applying for the new role would mean leaving the team and virtually everything I know. If this were just a normal company with no major changes and restructures ahead then perhaps I’d apply for the job for the sake of injecting some excitement to my day. The unusual thing about my company is that we know it’s going to get sold in a year or two, we’re all going to get a major bonus after that and half the company is planning to resign as soon as that bonus hits their bank. Sometimes I think I’m better off counting myself one of those people – this company has never managed to bring out all of my potential, so why not stay hidden and comfortable where I am until the day I’m rich and I can afford to leave altogether? I still don’t know the answer.

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